I almost quit again…
Somehow, I always seem to find myself looking at my analytics. How many views did I get on YouTube today? Have I got 10 followers on my blog yet? When are people going to start appreciating the content I put out? I don’t get ‘upset’ or anything when I see these numbers because I know that everything takes time, but you do begin to lose focus on what’s important.
I often find myself thinking, is it really worth it?
Last week, I thought the answer had presented itself to me when I forgot to upload to YouTube and thought to myself, “who even cares?”.
This was the end.
It was at this point when I realised that I was about to make the biggest mistake of my life. It’s very easy in life to back down when times get tough, or to give up when things stop going your way, especially when you have to invest time or money into whatever it is you’re failing at. At this point, we tend to look at the bad times and recognise the struggle, while we forget about all the good times associated with the bad times and the relief we feel when we push through the struggle.
For most of us, giving up is almost 100% natural because that’s what we’ve been taught to do, believe it or not. Parents love pushing their children into doing things because that’s what humans are supposed to do, stuff. The difference here is that when your parents make you do stuff, you keep doing it because they want you to. My parents didn’t ask me to do this… No one did. I started this blog and my YouTube channel because I wanted to.
What on earth were you thinking when you thought making YouTube videos would be a good idea?
Honestly, I have no idea. I love helping people and giving advice, and to do this I have to communicate with people one way or another. I also enjoy writing and producing videos because it enables me to document parts of my life, as well as offering a platform for me to express my thoughts. Writing is some form of release for me.
So, what is it? Am I trying to help people, or help myself? Or is this just something I can say to hide the fact that I want to be famous?
Funny thing is, the three concepts are actually the same.
I have a lot of faith in my ideas and my content because I believe someone somewhere will read this one day and benefit from my perspective. I tell myself that offering advice or help to someone else, not only benefits them but also me, as it enables me to put myself in their shoes, as I sit back and come up with various solutions to their problems as if I’m the one that needs help. In doing this, you find yourself forever leaving footprints on other people’s hearts and building a community bigger than you’ll ever imagine.
This is where my definition of famous begins to differ from everyone else’s. Does fame determine how many millions of people watch your useless stories on Snapchat? Or how many hundreds of people learn from and build off of you every day? Does fame count if you still feel lonely at the end of each day?
I don’t want the fans… I want the family.
The goal for me isn’t to have limitless fans and unlimited money, although it’d be useful. I want the power to help people. To change the world as best I can. I went into engineering not to build a car or to master the art of calculus, but to become the world’s greatest problem solver of all time. Or at least in the top 10…
I never expected people to believe in me from day one, I know how the story goes. Seeing is believing, and for you to believe in Superman, I’m going to have to show you my powers, the only problem I face is that before I can show you, I must show myself.
That’s what the journey is all about, showing you, me and everyone else that I’m not just some guy that doesn’t like doing his homework, I am and always have been something more… Something powerful.
I’ve always found an excuse, and even today I’m still looking for excuses to avoid having to come face to face with reality, the reality that life won’t move unless I push it, that people won’t believe me until I fly.
I’m not ready today, and I probably won’t be there tomorrow, but next week? Next year? Understand this… One day I’m going to fly, and when I do, lord knows you better start running, cause WHEN I get there, I’ll be coming for you… I’ll be coming for change.
Understand this, I WILL get there eventually – I won’t stop until I do.
Question(s) of the day: What do you find yourself constantly giving up on, then feeling bad and coming back to? What’s your dream, and why haven’t you caught it yet?
Let me know below!